Funke My $*xy Secretary - Episode 11 - 14

Episode 11
As I take escape the beatings and torture by the soldiers na only GOd fit explain o, where I was busy saying my last prayer and asking God to let me see Kate’s face before I die one of the soldier who happened to be Temi’s cousin heard this and realized I still love temi … He ordered the toture to be postponed, after then he set up a meeting with temi’s father..,..
**Wedding Day**
I know you’ll be surprised well the wedding is between I and Temi, I had to marry her if I wanna stay longer on earth…..
Pastor : Who doesn’t want this couples to be joined together should stand up and say it now or….
Funke: I sir.
I then whispered to temi’s dad that there is the girl that called him a d–k….

Temi’s dad: Seal the door soldiers
Funke: **Shocked and surprised**
Temi’s dad: You called me a d–k, soldiers take her to the guard room
Funke: **she started begging** ok then see this photos before you take me
Temi’s dad: Your plans won’t work, he has already told me everything that happened between you two , soldiers I said to the guard room…
** feeling relaxed**
(in my apartment with my new wife)
While enjoying a lovely program I love watching with temi , don’t bother to ask how come we started living a comfortable life together well the truth of matter is I actually fell in love with her since she was the mother of my baby….
**knock on the door**
As I opened the door three masked men barged into my apartment with heavy weapons , they didn’t say anything they just headed to my room and took away Kate my daughter, at that moment I was helpless…
**crying**
Oh lord why me , not again, who kidnapped my beloved daughter? , how will I get her back, while thinking about what’s going on a call came in with an unknown id
Caller: If you want your daughter alive , arrange a sum of 10million naira in the next 4days, we’ll get back to you….
Me: Can I ….
Caller: **drops the call**

Episode 12
10 million naira where I wan see am, several thoughts running through my mind , it was later I realized my father in law is a top police official…
Me: Good day sir.
Temi’s dad: Don’t worry I’ve already read the news , I am already working on it …

**knock on my door**
Gate man: Sir a lady said I should give you this envelope
Me: Ok
When I opened the envelope i saw some photos in the envelope, it contains of photos of my daughter being maltreated…a small sheet of paper dropped and it has some writings on it which goes thus
” by now you’ll realize we mean business, and besides don’t bother trying to find out the person behind it, it’s actually two people (funke and funke)” on reading this I fainted so I put a call to temi’s dad informing him about the latest development ..
So I decided to visit him in his office next day, on getting there the officers did not even bother to tell him that am around since they already know me as his son in law….on getting to his door I heard some arguments and something told me to wait and hear what’s going on….
Temi’s dad : You didn’t have to go that far to maltreat my grand daughter
Strange voice: I had to make it real na sweetie , you know we’ll share the money equally.
Temi’s dad: Sha don’t kill my daughter in law…
On hearing this I tip toed back to the counter acting like an emergency came up on phone so in order for the officers not to suspect anything I told them to tell their boss I’ll be back that an important issue came up….
**thinking **
So my father in law is behind all this, that means my wife is even involved….. Well I know what to do…. But I really need to confirm whether my wife is involved, at the time I was thinking I had forgotten I was driving not until I ran into an oncoming vehicle …..
Stranger: Are you drunk? Now you have delayed me for appointment with the governor…
Me: Lalaski
Stranger: Is that you John?
To cut the long story short, lalaski is my day one gee from uni due to,one issue we lost contact , we later went to a nearby bar to discuss, it was when then I narrated all I was going through to him and I was shocked at his response….
Lalaski: Don’t worry in the next two days I’ll get your daughter back, but I really need to see the governor asap…
We exchanged contacts and I was really surprised at his response…..

Episode 13
I hooked up with lalaski and we talked about getting my daughter back and also to find out if my wife is also involved in the kidnap.
Lalaski later told me his a secret agent for the npf(Nigeria Police Force), this actually gave me a sigh of relief … He said since we know the people involved we should also play a game with them but little did we know the game would go sideways, we actually failed to deliver the money they requested for so they went ahead to kidnap my mom. I informed lalaski about the new development and he himself realized they now mean real business ….
First my daughter now my mom, what the hell is going on , temi also fell ill because of this which gave me a second doubt whether she is involved or not, well till I see concrete evidence I would know the truth… Lalaski then decided that we bug temi’s father to know more about their plans.
Two days after they kidnaped my mom I did not receive any message from the kidnapers which was really bothering me. We successfully bugged him and still we had nothing and we did not receive any message from the kidnappers..
**thinking**

Which kind yawa be this, what have I done to myself my mom and my daughter now being held captive by my so called father in law … While a call came in from lalaski…
Me: Any development bro?
Lalaski: Meet me at …… We just received Intel about their hideout ..,
I stayed in the car while lalaski and his other agents went inside the building while I stayed inside the car like a coward busy praying for their safety , not long I heard gun shots which shocked me ,then I saw them coming out with several people cuffed including my father in law cuffed and my mother being blind folded…
Me: Who got shot ?
Lalaski: A lady (funke) but she managed to escape …
Me: Haaaaa my nightmare escaped again, that means trouble o
Lalaski: Will you stand there sobbing or won’t you unfold your mom ..
After unfolding my mom hands the unexpected happened when she set her eyes on temi’s dad…
My mom: Segun is that you
Me: **shocked** you know him
My mom: I don’t just know him, his your father….

Episode 14
**a week later **
I had pack out of my house, now staying with lalaski because I really dunno what to do.. Lalaski had gone a on a special project with the governor and I was really getting tired of boredom and idleness so I decided to stroll out…..
Still walking without a destination not long i noticed a black van speeding towards me and before I know what was going on I was covered with a black bag, it was later when my eyes were opened I realized I had being kidnapped ….
**thinking**
Again again what is my problem with kidnappers for Christ sake , I was eager to know who kidnapped me not long funke walked in and before I could say anything a hot slap landed on my face it was then I realized that girls hand are indeed iron hands..
**advice to the guys**
Fear ladies they can do and undo at anytime o, if you think you are smart just remember that a lady is also cunning o so know how to play your game well……

**funke dials a number**
Hello commissioner this is your lovely funke on the line, I have your one and only son here, infact your only child …
Me: You mean his not temi’s dad….
Again a hot slap landed on my cheek and at that time I decided to keep mute like a DVD player whose volume is on 0….
Funke: Now I need 10million naira , in the next four days I’ll call you back about the collection, your one and only love funke #muah
Funke: Mr chop and clean , won’t you show us your powers now ni …
Me: **just thank God say I’m tied**
Funke: Eh ya so na mouth you get, anyways I miss that p—k of yours don’t worry I have a gift for you later in the day and don’t think you’re getting out of here hale and healthy, that’s even if you don’t die sef…..
Omo see me gbege o, chai I really need a miracle from God right now….. Not long enough lalaski walked in laughing at me…..
Almost through with exams , bear with me guys